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Hi Everyone! Do any of you like to be daring at times? I know that I do when I get a certain type of twitch (LOL). Well, last week was one of those times. My hubby (he is such a loveable teddy bear he he!) and I went to the lake and hung out at this little lakeside bar and grill. Beautiful sunshine, lots of margaritas, very nice speed boats (docked), and plenty of young hard barely covered bodies of both genders. WOW! What a mix to get the juices flowing (giggle). Well, let me explain how my body was reacting. I was wearing a lite short summer dress and after some drinking, some dancing, and my god the viewing; I could not take it any more. By the time we left, my body was so hot and moist that you would have thought that I was wearing wool pants. I knew that there was no way of making it back home without getting this itch scratched (laugh). Since hubby had to drive (and he loves to watch me play anyway, he he!) it was time to pull something out of my to go bag. With a fair amount of traffic and not wanting to be to obvious, something of a more discreet nature is just what the doctor ordered. I chose the dual bullets. These clit stimulators come in various forms such as bullets, eggs, torpedoes, bears, dolphins, etc. They come in single or dual form and if you like high-tech, they have some with remote control, computer control, or some that can be controlled by phone. Now that is that I call phone sex! (laugh) There are various ways to use these critters. Single stimulators can be used to energize and stimulate the clitoris alone or while using a dildo or dong. It can be inserted to stimulate your g-spot. Whew, I am starting to perspire just thinking about it. The dual models are even more exciting. You can insert and stimulate all at the same time. If you are using a dildo you can stimulate the clitoris and the anus at the same time. That is what I call a three-way - giggle! I think you get the gist of these little critters and now on to the rest of my story. Now, you have to realize that I had never used these critters before and was not sure what to expect. I started by raising my dress just a little (so hubby could get a little glimpse and then inserted one bullet inside my thong underwear on top of my clitoris. Then I turned on the bullet slowly. Oooh, you really don’t know how good that felt. After a few moments, I slowly inserted the other bullet inside of me, moving it toward the g-spot. When I turned that one on, I literally thought that I was going to go through the roof. With all the squirming and gyrating that my lower body was doing and with my nipples starting to pop, hubby was about to bust his shorts open (giggle). By the time, I increased the speed of the bullets to two, I climaxed to a degree that was incredible. My thighs and butt muscles tensed up to the point of almost cramping. I felt as though I had run ten miles in less than ten minutes. Which, by the way, was about the time it took for those critters to work. This type of toy is something that no woman should be without. They will give you one hell of a rush. OH HUBBY! - He could not stand much more so, I gave him a little oral treat during the remaining drive.

Is it OK to fake an Orgasm?

Is there something wrong with a woman that has not experienced an orgasm?

These are a couple of questions that I have been getting asked more and more, so I thought why not address them through my articles? As much as I have written this for my ladies, men you can benefit from reading this little bit of info also!

There is nothing physically wrong with women that have not experienced the big O! They simply just have not learned how. It is very much a mental exercise as well as physical. Way back when…, we were taught that it was a bad thing to touch ourselves (masturbate). That was a big wrong turn for a lot of women. I have read a lot of letters from women that tell me that they were in their late 20`s before they ever experienced an orgasm, one that they would consider an orgasm anyway. This is why I express over and over, ladies learn about YOUR BODY! Orgasms are very connected to ones mind when dealing with the female. If you are worried or tired or feeling a bit at odds with your partner, that door is definitely going to be locked, even nailed shut. It will take some work and patience to find the key to open up that mind trap.

Too many women spend way too much time worrying about orgasms. Worry only puts up the walls that will totally disable your mind to relax and float. Think of watching and waiting for water to boil. By the time it has boiled you have lost interest. Or when you are trying to call someone and the line is forever busy, that just frustrates you to no end. If you would have just carried on with something else at the time, the water would have boiled before you knew it, the phone line would be cleared, and you would be frustration free! Orgasms work in very much the same way. Do not think about them. Do prepare for them, feel your body call them, desire them, fantasize, open your mind up to a total zone of passion. Pure thoughtless passion!

Some women feel that if they do not orgasm, their partner will feel that they have failed them, or vice verse. (GUILT) There is absolutely no room for guilt or shyness in the arena of sex! This is one of the reasons women FAKE the O! It does not do any real physical harm to fake most things in life. The only one that is losing out though, is you. You are fooling no one but yourself. Then you end up feeling even worse because you pretended at a time when you should be open and real.

There is also the time thing. Women are in need of more stimulation and time to relax and be able to find their zone. Men tend to think that five minutes is just super…NOT…so ladies this is where communication comes into play. You must tell your man that NO, I am not there yet. I know this sounds bossy, but most men hardly ever have a problem telling the women what to do in bed and when to not stop. Also ladies please tell your man to do like the yellow pages commercial, “Let your fingers do the walking”. Women like and need the finger play. Also ladies if your man is just down there asap…tell him to slow down. This can also throw women off when they are feeling rushed.

When you are close to your partner and feel that sex is in the air, enjoy even just the kiss at first. I mean really enjoy just the kiss. Allow your body to warm up and get your juices flowing. Or really feel his touches, and listen to your partners voice when he says your name. If he never says your name, tell him too. He will oblige immediately. Tell him you want to hear him admire your body. A women on the norm has a hard time verbalizing what she likes. This is just because we were raised to be nice girls. Well, TALK! You will be surprised at how much more relaxed you become and excited once you can talk to your partner about touching where and how. Tell your partner to join you in that little game. A women’s body will react very nicely if you just allow the feelings of a kiss to penetrate you.

Another turn on for you ladies is to touch yourself while your partner watches. Yes, you will love it once you allow him into your world. He will not say no to that request. To see or hear how excited he gets watching you enjoying your body is another very big turn on for you. This is also a very good way to keep your mind away from the, “will I or won`t I” question. Think of anything but the ultimate O!

G-spot orgasms are pretty easy to reach. We can get there as easy as men have the ability to get hard. To get there just tell your man to do the, “walking”. Or take his hand and guide him down to where your body is wanting his touch. G-Spot orgasms feel nice and they are basically our juice fountain, that is when we get very wet. This is when your body prepares for penetration.

It is the clitoral Orgasm that most women are after. Those ones will shake your ground. But again, these are mind connected. I will say I am speaking for the norm of women. Every women is different to a degree, but we are basically after the same thing. We all want to feel that intense vibration and the total body rush that runs through our body. It is an adrenaline rush like no other. To know we have that kind of control in our minds and bodies also boosts our self-esteem! That my Ladies is a very good thing!

Some women are sensitive enough that they will react instantly to a touch. That is not always that good. Her orgasm at that point will be quick and over before she even gets to really appreciate it. The longer it takes to reach that ,”O” Zone, the more intense the orgasm. That is another reason you want to learn to control your body. Eventually you will be able to tell your mind when and where!

A very, very good way to learn about your body is to bring yourself to orgasm. I tell women that all the time. You need to know and be able to connect with your own mind before you can allow someone to do it for you. Once you can learn to control your minds ability to fantasize or totally zone out, your body will follow naturally. Ladies again, it is so important to learn this because it keeps your mind off whether or not the O is going to happen. Once you have learned about your body, you will be able to bring that O on yourself just with your mind. A little hand stimulation is also your minds best friend here. You will know how much stimulation you will need at the time. You will eventually know your entire body`s secret passages to feeling. Yes! Very yummy. So my words here, are to get to know your secrets.. and HAVE FUN!

Remember Ladies, men are not born with your road map to orgasm. First you need to draw it for him. Then show it to him. From there it is totally the big,” O” every time. This is my recipe to the one thing that women can do over and over again, without a rest period. Ha!! Sorry guys, we were born that way.

Is YOUR wife one of the growing number of “cheating wives” in the US? Is she going to be? What’s good for the gander is now good for the goose, according to recent studies. The number of cheating wives is growing, and may soon equal the number of cheating husbands. You need to know the signs, because you can’t stop her if you don’t know she’s doing it. You also need to know the preventatives, because prevention is the very best cure. WHY IS SHE CHEATING? 1. Opportunity. With working outside the home, working out, travel and the Internet, “when there’s a will there’s a MUCH easier way.” 2. Desire + Permission. You can’t hit a website these days without reading about the G-spot, Astroglide, and multiple orgasms. Women now have the same permission as men to be into their sexuality. 3. She wants to be driven wild with desire and you don’t know how to do it. Women’s desire and arousal aren’t connected like a man’s. In fact, the company that makes ViagraR has finally given up trying to make a similar pill for women, after years of research. As someone said, men are like microwaves and women are like conventional ovens, they need to be preheated. 4. You aren’t establishing the emotional connection that primes the preheating. Too close, too much time together, and you smother one another. Too distant, too little time with her, and she’ll look elsewhere. 5. Your relationship isn’t sensual enough. For more information on why to sensualize your relationship and practical instructions on how to, see my e-manual. “Sensualizing Your Relationship.” 6. You aren’t showing and expressing your appreciation. If she’s interested in it, and you can afford it, get it for her. 7. You’re saying too many negative things about her and the relationship. Say three positive things for every negative thing. You guys are supposedly great at rule-based systems, so plug that formula in and use it. It’s the Magic Formula. 8. You haven’t developed your empathy. You can’t tell her feelings and intentions. This is a big “not good” one. 9. You chose wrong in the first place, and need to figure out why. WHAT ARE THE SIGNS? 1. She’s losing weight and sprucing up her appearance. New hairstyle, nails, new clothes. 2. Change in style of dress. She’s accommodating to a new man’s taste, or he’s buying her new things. 3. New lingerie you aren’t getting to see, but it’s there in the lingerie drawer. 4. Phone calls at odd times. When you answer, they hang up. 5. A huge change in the landline phone bill, and/or cell phone bill. 6. She’s become distant. Seems distracted. Talks to you less in general. 7. She’s lax about your comings and goings. She doesn’t care what you’re up to any more. 8. Less arguments. Her mind is elsewhere. The same things don’t matter to her any more. (In this case, less “nagging” is not a good sign.) 9. She stays away from the house and has suspicious reasons for doing so. 10. She suddenly has to work late and weekends all the time. 11. She’s weakened relations with her parents, spending less time with them, less visits, saying less. Same with girlfriends. 12. You come home early and find a babysitter. (Let’s hope you don’t find the lover.) 13. You find telltale things in the glove box and trunk of the car; fancy lingerie, notes, cards, phone numbers. 14. Flowers arriving at the house. She says they’re from her boss, a colleague or a friend. 15. Unaccountable charges on your credit cards. 16. You’re over budget. She’s asking for more money. People having an affair spend money. They buy gifts for their lover, go to motels, rent cars, travel. Women do this just as much as men. 17. Disappearing to spend time on the Internet. A good way to meet people or to conduct an affair. 18. Strange emails. If you have joint email, check it out. 19. Changes in the children’s behaviour. Children don’t miss what’s going on. 20. Change in your sex life. More interest in variety in sex and new things. She’s learning something new from the new guy. Or she’s no longer interested in sex with you. 21. Lapses in routines. She’s no longer that interested when you track in mud, whether you drop your dirty clothes on the floor, or working in her garden. Studies show that many people who have affairs aren’t interested in leaving their spouses. If you catch the signs early, you can do something about it. A good, supportive marital relationship can generally bear the strain of temptation. It goes without saying it relies on emotional intelligence and relationship skills. Women particularly need the emotional connection, and sensual time as well as sexual. One key to a marriage that will last is if the couple can sense when one another is sad. Can you tell when she is? If not, work on your EQ. It’s empathy, an EQ competency. Another sign is when the number of positive things they say about each other and relationship outnumber the negative things. All couples have problems, but attitude and relationship skills can tip the balance. If you’re saying, “It’s not that bad yet,” look again. Why would you wait until it IS that bad. Desire comes from arousal with women when there is intimacy and emotional connection. You know this, and if you’re ignoring it, you may be re-reading those 21 signs and adding some more of your own. I hear men say all the time, “I had no idea she was unhappy. She just walked out one day.” This sort of “cluelessness” is probably what made her wander in the first place. She may have been telling you all along something was wrong and you weren’t hearing it (selective listening). All of this can be addressed by working on your emotional intelligence. If you’re not good at reading her feelings and intention, this can be fatal to your relationship with your wife. The good news is you can learn Emotional Intelligence, and improve your relationship and chances of being cheated on. If you don’t want your wife to cheat on you, get smart. Get EMOTIONALLY smart!

I guess the majority of us have heard about Tantric sex and massage. Had anyone asked me what it was exactly I would have giggled shyly and muttered something about gentle touching, feathers, massage and no orgasm. How wrong I was.

Tantric massage is basically just a massage. However it was created from the belief that if you are sexually happy and relaxed then your health will benefit. The Hindus describe Tantra as achieving personal growth through pleasurable existence. The massage itself does tend to cause orgasms, but these are described as a bonus rather than the aim.

Although Tantric massage does not involve actual penetrative sex, it does involve full on touching of the organs. For this reason you will not find it offered down your local health centre. You are far more likely to find it on offer in the many massage parlours in London and other major cities.

If you want to have a go with her or him indoors here is a pretty basic guide to Tantric massage.

Firstly, from this point on, your manhood is referred to as Lingam (wand of light - don’t be thinking light sabre it’s not that big!) and the lady’s bits are called Yoni (sacred space or sacred temple). Let’s face it those words sound much nicer than the alternatives.

If you are visiting somewhere for your massage you need to decide in advance whether you will be getting naked or not. Proper Tantric masseuse prefer you to be naked, they believe this helps the healing process all over your body. If you are shy you can choose to keep some clothes on, I am guessing you will want to cover your Lingam or your Yoni. If you are at home with the missus or the husband, get your kit off and turn the heating up.

Choose some gentle music (whale music is optional). Now banish all thoughts of kneading your lover all over until she or he begs for mercy. It’s not that kind of massage. Make your lover lie on his or her back, legs apart and a cushion under the hips to raise up the Yoni/Lingam area and a cushion under the head so they can look at their genitals. Explain that although there will not be any penetrative sex this evening you will take them to previously unknown heights of sexual satisfaction. It may help to convince them if you do not print off this article and place it next to them on the bed. Choose your lubricant wisely; chocolate body sauce has no place here.

The massage itself involves every part of the body, although I guess the Yoni/Lingam area will receive more than its fair share of attention. The massaging of the body is to help prepare the receiver for the attention you will be paying their genitals.

Yoni Massage

Pour a small amount of oil on to the mound of the Yoni, just enough so it drips down the outer lips. Massage each outer lip slowly between thumb and forefinger, sliding up and down the entire length of the lip. Only ask your lover if the pressure is too much or not enough. Try to look into their eyes during the massage and ensure she can see what you are doing. Do the same for the inner lips of the Yoni. Take your time and watch your lover relax.

The jewel in the crown is the clitoris. Four times more sensitive that your Lingam so take it easy here. Begin by gently stroking it in a clockwise and anti-clockwise direction and squeeze it gently between your thumb and index finger. The missus will be well and truly fired up by now but try not to allow an orgasm just yet, let the sensations build. If it becomes too much, just back off a bit and encourage her to breathe deeply. Now insert the middle finger of your right hand (I can’t remember why it has to be the right one but I shouldn’t think it would cause too much trouble if you need to use your left instead.) and gently feel around inside continuing to massage gently.

With your palm facing upwards and your middle finger buried in the Yoni, bend your finger back towards the palm and you should feel a spongy area just under the pubic bone. This is known as the G-spot (”that’s where it is!” I hear you yell). Gently massage here, in circles, back and forth, side to side. Your lover may feel the need to pee but hopefully she should feel pleasure building slowly. At this point you may wish to insert the finger between your middle finger and your little finger. Whilst a few of your digits are employed inside, you may as well use your thumb to continue circling the clitoris. Another option is to leave your middle finger inside, continue stimulating the clitoris with your thumb and insert your little finger up her anus. I would suggest you perhaps test the waters first as anal penetration when you are not expecting it would definitely ruin the mood. Whilst all this is going on, your left hand may feel a little underused. Use it instead to continue stroking and massaging other parts of her body (her body parts not yours!). Your lover will more than likely experience a very intense orgasm and afterward will feel completely relaxed. She will generally drift off to sleep and leave you in a state of arousal with no prospect of a Lingam massage for you tonight!

Lingam Massage

Traditionally the giver, some men may find it difficult to lay back and think of England whilst his lover goes to work on his wand of light. However, I do suggest you give it a go bearing in mind the fantastic massage you gave her Yoni last night.

Get your man to lay back on the bed with a pillow under his head to enable him to see what you are doing. Put a pillow under his hips and spread his legs with his knees bent. His Lingam must be completely exposed. Begin as before by gently massaging all over his body, avoiding this area for a while. This allows him to become completely relaxed and prepared for the touching of the Lingam. Pour a small amount of oil over his shaft and testicles and begin gently massaging his testicles. Next massage the area on the pubic bone above the Lingam. Massage the area between his testicles and his anus (perineum). Moving on to the Lingam, gently grasp the base with your right hand and move up the shaft and then remove your hand, repeat with the left hand. Do this for some time, then change to grasping the Lingam at the top, slide down the shaft and remove your hand, replace with the left and repeat this process. The head of the Lingam is very sensitive and deserves special attention. Massage it in a circular motion. Don’t worry if the Lingam goes soft, it will shortly perk up again. Likewise if your partner seems to be on the brink of orgasm, back off and encourage deep breathing.

Keep bringing him close to orgasm and then back off. This is not a method of torture, it helps them to control their ejaculation and therefore achieve longer and more pleasurable orgasms. Whilst continuing to massage his Lingam, you can search for his sacred spot. This is located between his testicles and his anus. It is a small indentation about the size of a pea. If you massage here and gently increase the pressure he may well feel uncomfortable at first. Applying pressure here will help him gain control of his orgasms in future. If he is nearing ejaculation you can apply pressure here and this will increase the intensity of his orgasm.

The end of the massage is signalled by either ejaculation or snoring. If he is snoring you still have some practising to do. If he has ejaculated, you have some clearing up to do.

I am still very much a beginner however I was pleased to discover that Tantric massage is not a mysterious sexual cult and is certainly not difficult to do. Anyone with an hour to spare and a bottle of strawberry flavoured body oil can do it.

Welcome to my new site!  I’ve just bought this domain to start publishing useful sex tips for all men! Ibelieve all men should find this reading pretty interesting and useful for them. New articles to follow very soon!